I'm doing ArtFight, but just burnt myself out doing these four for random people.
I have taken a break from my previous colorful painting style, but now I feel guilt simply because I want to paint other people's characters for now! I just wanted a break from the stark black and white.
I seem to feel compulsive guilt and shame for everything in my fucking life. Changing my current art style just to try something different than what's currently on my Instagram, sucks!
So, I can't even feel normal when it comes to doing an older style of mine for some hobbyist art! It's just an art gifting game, it's not meant to make me feel inconsitent and rotten.
I know people love colored characters but all of mine ended up with greyscale reference pictures for now because I didn't want to color them, so naturally people are uninterested in drawing for me. I basically make myself unappealing no matter what I do. I had thought some people might like the monochromatic characters, but ArtFight isn't geared towards that.
As I said, I nearly always consider it a 'break' or 'haitus' when I switch up style. I feel rotten for drawing these four pictures alone, just because it deviates from the hardcore focus I had on LMBOW. That's the point, I burnt myself out with LMBOW. I need a break to do something random and to just LIVE.
I love LMBOW and it perculates in my mind at all times, I just deserve a break. To engage with other artists in a less narrow minded and narcissitic way. I just want to give people art.
I'm excited for AVCon on Sunday. I am excited about taking my baby daughter, even if she has a meltdown. I just hope I don't incur any snark from antinatalists attending just because I have a baby in tow. She is well behaved as heck.
